The Republican National Convention: Send In The Clowns

The only thing missing from last night’s opening of the Republican National Convention was Leni Riefenstahl’s “Triumph of the Will” as the prelude to Donald Trump’s entrance. Hair Trump and the rabid crowd of haters would have felt right at home with the surreal homage to a psychotic dictator.

Did the remaining members of Queen actually give the RNC permission to use “We Are the Champions” at the convention? It’s hard to believe, but if true, I’ll have to plug my ears and “na, na, na,” my way through the inevitable assault of “Bohemian Rhapsody” throughout the remaining years of my life.

One of the big headlines today is the revelation that portions of Melania Trump’s speech last night were lifted from a speech given by Michelle Obama. Is your head spinning too? It’s like Cruella de Vil giving a speech at the American Dog Fighting convention using quotes lifted from Mother Theresa. The only thing more ironically idiotic would have been to plagiarize Hillary Clinton, but never fear, the convention has just started.

And then there was former NYC Mayor Rudy Giuliani’s raging, spittle-flecked speech, in which at one point he yelled at the crowd, “Are we crazy?” and they shouted back, “Yes.” The inmates share a brief moment of self-awareness.

Of course, what Republican gathering would be complete without the lies. Lies upon lies upon lies. From Benghazi to Hillary to Obama to Black Lives Matter, conservative barkers spun yarn after yarn, regurgitating the Republican litany of demonstrable falsehoods to a bloodthirsty crowd who live in an alternate reality. The Republican convention is clearly a truth-free zone.

We all like to laugh at conspiracy theorists and religious zealots who constantly predict the end of the world, only to have the target day pass like any other, but you can’t watch the Republican convention without a bit of an uneasy feeling that, should these lunatics gain control of our government, our days on this planet are numbered.

Republicans and smaller government: The big lie.

Stop any Republican on the street and ask that person what his party stands for and I guarantee you one of the first things to come out of his mouth will be “smaller government.” Ronald Reagan famously said, “Government isn’t the solution. Government is the problem.” Sometimes stated openly, sometimes only implied, Republicans and libertarians want the government to be less involved in their lives. Okay, I can certainly appreciate that as a tenet of their party, but how does it square with their proposals, policies and platforms?

Here’s what small Republican state and federal government looks like. Some of these things have happened, some are happening now, and some are merely wishful thinking:

• Outlaw abortion
• Punish doctors who perform abortions and women who try to get them
• Restrictions on contraceptives
• Prayer in public schools
• Replace science and history in public schools with Christian myths
• Corporal punishment in schools
• Guns in schools, and everywhere else
• Continue the war on drugs and keep existing drug laws that favor punishment over rehabilitation. Build more prisons.
• Stop no-fault divorce and require marriage counseling
• Let insurance companies run healthcare in America
• Roll back regulations that affect the safety of the food you eat, the air that you breath and the water that you drink
• Continue rigging the economy to benefit the .01%
• Allow open discrimination and demonization of all none-white, non-Christian, non-heterosexual citizens
• Allow only the “right people” to immigrate to America
• Implement an international political approach that favors war over diplomacy
• Codify the unitary executive
• Drill for oil anywhere and everywhere

Does this sound like a political party that wants a smaller, less intrusive government?