Wednesday, September 04, 2013

Leaked audio transcript: President Obama meets with congressional leaders on Syria

September 4, 2013
Oval Office

Cantor: I’m on board with you, Mr. President. Let’s face it, bombing shit is cool.

Obama: Every other president got to bomb something. Bush got to start a couple of wars. I want to bomb something. Okay?

Pelosi: We want video.

Obama: Are you kidding? We’ll have camera’s all over that shit.

Clyburn: What about civilians? These targets are in highly populated areas of Damascus.

Obama: Jimmy, come on, man. Bring it down a notch. There’ll be a few casualties, but it’s all for the bigger good. Right?

Boehner: Can we get one of those cool “situation room” photos with us watching the whole thing go down live?

Obama: Hell yeah. Just don’t start crying, John. [laughs]

Clyburn: But Sir, the American people are not behind this. Shouldn’t we listen to our citizens?

[Silence for several seconds and then uproarious laughter.]

Obama: That’s good. Whoa. Someone get Jimmy a drink. I didn’t know you were such a funny guy. Let’s go golfing one of these days.

McCarthy: Speaking of golf, I’ve got a tee time in 45 minutes. We about done here?

Obama: We all on the same page? Jimbo? Good. Okay. Peace out.

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