No matter what your feelings about Texas Senator Ted Cruz, and there are few people with feelings that are other than negative, the man’s face is creepy. The sad, “poor baby” eyes, oversized ears and perpetual smirk just send out icky vibes to me. It looks like something carved out of cursed wood and covered with layers of shellac by an evil puppeteer. It’s the kind of face that if you put it on a poster with the caption, “Trust me,” the irony would be obvious. If Ted drove an ice cream truck through your neighborhood, you’d be nervous. I know judging a book by its cover is wrong, but look at that face. I mean really look deep into his eyes. Are you screaming yet?