Sunday, March 29, 2015

At an Indianapolis restaurant

This sign was recently posted in the window of an all-you-can-eat restaurant in Indianapolis.

Dear Patrons,

Our deeply held Christian beliefs prohibit us from serving the following people:

Homosexuals
African Americans
Asians
Atheists
Catholics
Jews
Muslims (especially you)
Hippies
Hipsters
Democrats
Wiccans
Satanists
Unitarians
Midgets, Dwarves or Gnomes
Anyone who has ever voted for a Clinton
Anyone with the last name Obama
Anyone with an IQ over 100
Welfare recipients
The homeless
Liberals
Socialists
Communists
Feminists
Transvestites
Sodomites
Prostitutes
Vegetarians
Vegans
Californians
Canadians
Scandinavians
Latin Americans
Indians (both kinds)
Anyone working in the liberal media (you know who you are)
The physically deformed
Anyone who regularly watches PBS
Anyone who is friends with my alcoholic Uncle Chester
Tom Hunter, who beat me up in fourth grade
Janice Paulson, who dumped me for Calvin Weathers in ninth grade
Zombies
Llamas
Anyone whose last name ends with an “I”
Pedophiles
Psychopaths
Anyone wearing saggy pants
Scientologists
Circus workers
Clowns
Anyone with a 666 license plate
Anyone with tattoos (Christian related tattoos exempt)


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