Thursday, December 12, 2013

Breaking FOX News: Santa and Jesus are white. Period.

Whew, I’m glad someone finally cleared that up. In response to a woman who wondered if perhaps Santa Claus could be represented as a black man, Megyn Kelly at FOX News assured racists everywhere that Santa is white, and that’s all there is to say about the matter. Oh, and so was Jesus.

Liberal whackos will argue that because Santa is a mythical character (oops, sorry kids) he can be any race, but that’s just leftist Christmas-hating propaganda. They’ll also try and convince you that if there was an actual historical Jesus, he would be dark-skinned because he was born in the Middle East. Phttt! I’ve seen thousands of pictures of Jesus in my life and let me tell you, he was white in every one of them.

Don’t listen to the liberal media when they say there is no war on Christmas. What do you call these outrageous attacks on our most cherished superstitions? The next thing you know they’ll be arguing that the tooth fairy is gay and the Easter Bunny is really a gerbil. It’s time for us all to stand up and defend our racist, sexist icons from the politically correct, pointy-headed commies.

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