According to a number of prominent conservative Christians,
the world’s going to end this September. Yawn. I don’t know, something about
blood moons and Israel and the Pope speaking to Congress… it’s a fundamentalist
Christian’s wet dream of convergences where God finally gets out of his
Laz-y-Boy and makes his way to Earth to tell the faithful, “Y’all were right.
Kill the liberals.”
With silver-haired, pinched-faced pastor John Hagee leading
the mob, Christians are getting their ascension robes dry-cleaned and
cancelling any October plans they might have made.
Well, I’d like to issue them a challenge.
If you believe with all your heart that the world is going
to end in September, you won’t have any problem participating in a small wager.
If the world does end this fall, well, I’m screwed, you’re in heaven for
eternity and we’ll all be spared one more sequel of The Expendables. If you’re
wrong, however, and I’m still cleaning out the cat box on October 1, you, Mr.
Hagee, will be responsible for collecting $10 million to be deposited into my
checking account by the end of the year. And, you’ll donate another $10 million
to the Bernie Sanders for President campaign (It’s not all about me).
I await your response in the comments section, Pastor Hagee. Any
time now.
No comments:
Post a Comment